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My Insens Blog: How 120 Days of Yoga Transformed Me

I arose on October 28 with a newfound sense of accomplishment for my ability to actually find the inner strength—through years of turmoil from divorces, loss, death, financial ruin, cancer and betrayal—to finish 120 days of consecutive yoga practice. I realize this may seem utterly ridiculous to those who were born with discipline and determination and would find my challenge to be a cakewalk. We don’t need pats on the back for brushing our teeth everyday or taking a shower, so why would we expect accolades for doing 120 days of consecutive yoga as a personal experiment in self-love, forgiveness and discipline? Indeed, many would scoff at someone who felt the need to embark on a yoga quest that involved counting days of practice vs naturally integrating yoga’s gentle rhythm into everyday existence.

Anyone who scoffs must not have lived my life. And this is where compassion enters the picture. I was shocked at the reactions I received from some self-appointed spiritual people, including teachers, whom I encountered through my journey and the judgment that my 120 days evoked in them.

But this October 28 was sweet for me. My 120th day of practice was spent in an early morning goddess class with five beautiful women in a nurturing, supportive environment. The class was fluid, filled with laughter and grace. The teacher, Honeybee, is pixie cute with a fairy-like twinkle in her eyes that spells mischief! She has a gentle kindness to her manner and her class was perfect and fitting for my last day of this particular yoga journey experiment. It reflected to me my own journey as a woman, a being who chose to incarnate into female form at this time of transition and transformation on earth.

The practice of yoga, especially Bhakti yoga, has been the missing link to my finding some inner calm and balance in what has been a turbulent life experience. It is a practice that is forever and belongs to everyone, not just the lithe, beautiful models who grace the covers of yoga magazines. It’s for young girls, moms, grandmothers, young men, dads and grandfathers. It is for those with pounds to lose or pounds to gain, for those struggling with disease or enjoying wellness, for those with all of their limbs and those without. It is a celebration of the human condition in all its forms and iterations in any given moment in time. It is one that I truly hope each of you reading these words will experience in your own way and your own time as you celebrate the teacher within. My wish for you as you embark upon or continue your yoga journey is for shelter, a nourishing supply of food for your body and soul, clean fresh water to drink, friendship, fellowship, wellness, peace, grace, self love, ananda (bliss) and the unconditional love of the divine, as you realize your own inner samadhi, as you enjoy the lila, the enchanted dance of your existence.

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